Chapter 21
Fire and Ice
The wind shook me again and the tent.
The temperature was falling. The cold penetrated into the sleeping bag in his jacket. I was wrapped up from head to toe, with hiking boots still laced. How could that made it so cold? Sooner or later should have the slightest touch and go up, right?
Jacob had gone quite a while, 'and I was just beginning to chatter, even though I had slipped his jacket also enormous.
"cc-s-what time is it?" I asked with a little 'difficulty.
"Almost midnight," said Edward.
As promised, was left out under the snow, but for any requirement, had not moved away from the camp. I felt, though I whispered, as I was intent to control the trembling of my body.
"What happened to J-ff-Jakob? I'm going to cc-freeze ', I complained with chattering teeth.
"It's coming, I hear his thoughts, and knows that I'm listening. He has been around long to not cross the wakes, he talked a lot with the pack and Charlie held him at home. It was a bit 'tipsy', heard him laugh. Well, at least Charlie was enjoying himself. "It will be here in a few seconds," reassured.
sighed relieved. It was my only chance to survive the night.
"What is mm-move ', while mugugnai could not feel my hands.
Then finally heard his voice hoarse and defiant in the distance.
"Now you can go to get a ride, bloodsuckers."
"J-Jake, stop it. I remained in close vv-a-your absence, days-at least tell him thank you, "chided him now in the grip of creepy.
"Gg-thanks, bloodsucker," he said teasing him and me.
"Duty" said Edward quiet.
I heard the zipper open quickly.
Jacob slipped into the opening he could exploit the most minuscule, while the wind blew around the Arctic and a few flakes of snow fell at the bottom of the tent. I had such a thrill to look like a violent convulsion.
"I move for a control and to chase something," said Edward while Jake zip. "I invite you to make the tent as if it were your own. We wish you a good night. "
"Well, it's best if we And I mean if you come back all right or not, "Jacob suggested, ignoring everything else.
Edward said after a second longer than necessary.
"Okay, do I have to. I'll try to be honest with you. See you later. " He did not understand the meaning of that phrase. What has to be honest with the formation lap?
"Hello baby, excuse the delay," Jacob whispered as he opened the zipper of my sleeping bag to slip inside.
"It was a-oo-now arrived," I grumbled.
"Do not tell me," he muttered.
Stipe's body in the tiny space and had to force the hinge chiudersela behind. His arms tightened around me and pressed firmly against his bare chest. The heat was irresistible, like the air after prolonged dive underwater. Shuddered when, impatient, sank her fingers into his skin.
"Wow, you're frozen, Bella," he complained.
'cc-I wonder why, "stammered .
"Try to relax," suggested, while yet another tremor shook me violently. "Two more hours and you would jump to the toes," he muttered.
"But because edward said Ee-cc-so? Pp-What did you think? "I asked as I felt the warmth of her body against mine cold. Jake shrugged.
"I take advantage of this forced cohabitation us for a chat and hear his stories."
I threw a dirty look, while the heat subsided convulsions making me talk decently.
"Jake, not abuse his remorse. He is also here to protect me, and fight only serves to irritate me. The thing was resolved, I promised that we will part. And he will. "
"It's like you say, but I'm not going down that his fault we lost all this time. He tried to manipulate, Bella. You see? ".
Sbuffai and I turned awkwardly on myself to give it back. "If I had let loose, I might not have appreciated the joints in La Push. I know what selfishness Jake, and I know that drives people to do everything to keep your side the one you love. I also intend to do with you, "I confessed, but regretted it immediately. I was afraid you angry.
"What do you mean?" He asked curiously.
I might as well spit the bullet sooner or later we would have to talk.
"Well," I muttered hesitantly. "I was referring to college and imprinting."
"Tell me what does this have two words in the same sentence, because it does not make sense."
took advantage of my position not to look into his eyes.
"Fortunata as they are, it is likely that your imprint is behind every corner of the campus which he attended. And I'm selfish because I do not want you to see, Jake. I do not want you to find your other half. I want you to stay with me forever, "I admitted.
"And how do you do that? I caverai eyes before you leave. "
"No, silly. I just thought to travel from Vancouver to Forks, instead of making you come to visit me in college. You will have to set foot there. Actually I do not want you to put the foot out of La Push for no reason. "
"Damn, you just afraid of losing me. Fantastic, "he said shaking and giving me a kiss on the cheek. "But will not your ex bloodsucker with you, right?" He asked immediately suspicious.
"Um, it was decided to start it."
Jacob grunted annoyed.
"Actually it would be very useful for exam preparation. But if I have to be honest, I did not want all this to continue studies. I still have to think about it. But are not you mad at me? "I asked confused.
"Because I want everything to you? I'm flattered. I also save your eyes, "he said, laughing. I laughed and turned her face to give me a kiss.
The sleeping bag was already warm and welcoming. Jacob's body heat seemed to come from everywhere, perhaps because it was so immense. I took off my boots and rubbed her feet against his legs. Winced and bowed his head to press his cheek warm against my ear numb.
that closeness did a thousand memories resurface. All infinitely pleasant.
"This temperature will be all right?" She whispered in my ear. Chance to travel on the same wavelength.
"Yes, it's perfect," I whispered.
He heard the sound of the zipper of the sleeping bag that was lowered: so there was a lot more space. Although the pungent air, the heat of the immense body of Jacob, continues to protect the teeth from the tap again.
"You know, you still purple lips. even that is good to heat, I do not like to leave the job half " he said. "And then we can resume the conversation to "think it's not like it, '" he continued with intense voice, while the spread collar shirt to kiss her neck softly. "You still have those sweet, right?" He asked, pointing a smile. They started the first
dizziness.
"But Jake, Edward's tent? It is not polite, "I asked while the item was lost along with my good intentions.
"She invited us to regard it as our own. It seems more rude not to accept his invitation, "he suggested with tone of mock innocence.
continued to draw designs with the soft tip of the tongue, along the length of the neck to the ear, while his hand stroked my legs hot.
I bit my lip almost in a state of trans, and I turned to find her.
"But ... Jake," I tried to say as I kept my mouth busy. "I do not recommend even for top athletes ... ... ... to do certain things before a race."
"I'm not an athlete," replied as I was turning to put it under him. "And then, are much more resistant than normal, "she whispered deep.
He saw the two-way.
"I know," I said while the brain was going to join the discretion and restraint in the Maldives. I was not staying anymore.
As I kissed her in a frenzy, annodai my legs to his hips and sank his fingers through his hair. He pressed his pelvis against mine, and shuddered.
"Bella," he murmured inflamed. Why
still say no, if I wanted it in a way absurdly unmanageable? Why rifutare that one-way ticket to Heaven?
There were no sensible answers to those questions, and I refused to think of what to expect in a few hours. If anything happened, I would have forgiven her for refusing what we both wanted?
For the first time, I wished that Edward could read that begged forgiveness mentally, to use as its hospitality, but I had no reason to stop. I had too many to go ahead and give us a slice of paradise. Before hell.
won by her and by my own desire to still belong to us, our hands were wandering in search of the buttons of his jeans.
Eager to touch the sky together with a finger.
'It came Seth, "Jacob whispered as I gently stroked her hair and smiled at me blessed. "And your friend is not far."
"I would like to ask him to apologize for my part, for abusing his hospitality," I mumbled sleepily.
said muttering something incomprehensible.
Slowly was silence, and gave my eyelids closed and my breathing became more regular and slow.
"That's right, baby, now sleep," Jacob whispered.
sighed, satisfied, already half asleep.
[...] Outside, the relentless wind howled through the trees. The tremors of the tent made sleep difficult. The pickets were trembling, bent suddenly and I drove back from the edge of slumber every time I thought I was about to slip into sleep. I felt so sorry for the wolf, the boy had to stay outside in the snow.
I wandered with my thoughts, waiting for sleep to find me.
"So, what's new?" Jacob said quietly.
"No, everything is silent," said Edward out of the tent.
Another gust of wind chill and compelling, filled the silence, but did not last long.
"It is not polite," Edward scolded.
"I know, but it's not my fault if I read constantly in mind. Nobody forces you to listen, "Jacob muttered, defiant but with a hint of embarrassment. "Get out of my head."
"I'd like to do that. You have no idea how loud your fantasies. You the same as if me screaming in my face. "
"Remember, not fantasies. And I assure you that they are very realistic, old boy. However, Bella I'm sorry for ... "but did not finish the sentence.
"There was no need to apologize. I offer you the knowledge that would happen. However, I accept his apology, because I know that keeps us, "said Edward.
"Well, then ... thank you," Jacob muttered, embarrassed again. "For his part," she added quickly. Edward felt laugh.
"Please, Jacob."
was silence for a moment.
"Yes," said Edward to an unspoken thought, with a murmur so low that you can barely grasp. "You're right, they are unforgivable."
"I should think so. But I want to know things that you have hidden, and what are your intentions now, "replied Jacob.
"I have not hidden anything, I told her everything there was to say. However, if you ask me, I was counting on his early indecision, and to be honest, even the fickleness of human sentiments. I knew that I was very fond, and who did not understand what you really feel about you. You were afraid that chose me, a fury to be near her, and I hoped until the last that went like this. "
I was too sleepy to ask the two to stop talking about me as if I were not there. The conversation had become almost a dream, I was no longer so certain of being awake.
Jacob snorted angrily, but let him speak.
"The wanted to protect, you know what you're impulsive, I did not injure yourself. Meanwhile, hoping to win her back. Switch the love that she was born in the last year, and I destroyed it with my hands, and andandomene break his fragile heart, "Edward admitted, sounding frustrated. "But you did not do anything but to go away from you. It was just a matter of time, he would have realized alone. In fact, a kiss is enough to make it collapse, because admit .... "
"To be in love with me," Jacob whispered, interrupting him.
"Yes Will seem strange, but in all that I feel relieved, and I'm grateful to be part of his life. Before had become obsessed, and I tried to make her because I do not want to condemn it to my own existence, but simultaneously with combined desired her for eternity. Your union has put all affixed. After all, remain in the world and attend to his happiness with you, is worse than hell, "Edward laughed softly.
"That way, it seems that he did it on purpose," Jacob stifled a laugh. "But it would be capable of. If she forgives is forgiven just because he has, I know something. It's too good. "
"You're right, and that is why I will continue to love her for eternity," said Edward seriously.
"This brings us to the most important thing," suggested Jacob.
"I'll stay behind the scenes, Jacob. Patients await the day that you get tired of you, or you get tired of her, or worse yet, you will have your imprint. But before that, do not lift a finger against you. I want you to be happy, and I'm not going to repeat the same mistake di mettermi in mezzo. E ci tengo a farmi perdonare anche da te, Jacob. Con te non deve cambiare niente, e può avere tutto ciò che desidera. Sei stato in grado di salvarla da sè stessa. Solo per questo ti sarò debitore per il resto dei miei giorni. Sei la cosa giusta di cui parlavo nel bosco, quella di cui solo adesso sono in grado di lasciarle fare», disse Edward con la voce che gli tremava dalla sincerità.
Jacob restò in silenzio a meditare.
«Ti avrò sempre in mezzo ai piedi?», domandò infine.
«Dipende da Bella», rispose Edward serene. "The intention is to stay with my family at home, available for your beautiful and if you want, for any need. Carlisle will move to go to hospitals in some other city where nobody knows him, but he'll be here too. Bella is the first that does not want us to leave, and I will stay in the shadows waiting, but I will be present whenever she wants. Perfectly hide the entrance to get to our driveway, so that no one enters and discovers there are still here, that are still young. "
"I think I have seen in the movies," said Jacob. They both laughed softly.
The joy was short-lived, as the silence that followed.
"And if my imprinting does not really exist? And if neither of them will tire of the other? What will you do? Can you be so patient as you say? "Asked Jacob to burst.
"Logical. In a hundred years I have learned to be. One hundred years waiting for her. But if you divide anything, I can only put an end to my life when she will die. "
At these words, Jacob winced.
"Sorry, I did not want to disturb you, too, with this thought. It 'better than sleep, tomorrow will be a busy day, "Edward said sorry. Jacob yawned
plan. "Are you sure that you will try to kill me in my sleep?" He asked sarcastically again. "You know, to speed up."
Edward laughed.
"You can sleep peacefully Jacob, I would not ever do such a thing. The conscience crush me, and I would get the effect contrary, "said Edward, still amused.
Jacob was silent for a moment and sighed. "Yes, you're right. I know this is right. But at times .... "
"Sometimes it seems like a fascinating idea."
Jacob buried her head in my sleeping bag to smother their laughter. "Exactly," said finally.
What a strange dream. I wonder if it was the incessant wind to make me imagine those whispers. But the wind was screaming rather than whispering.
"How you felt when you lost? "Jacob asked after a pause, and in his hoarse voice suddenly there was no trace of irony.
[...] "When I thought I'd be able to leave, it was bearable ... almost. Because I believed that he could forget, he could live as if it never existed. For more than six months I was able to stay away, keeping the promise not to interfere anymore with his life. It seemed that there doing the same: to fight, but I knew I would not have won, that sooner or later I would come back, even just to see how he was. I tried to convince me that I would have made. And if I found it reasonably happy ... I am under the illusion of being able to get away again. was what I should do, when I made it clear that I do not forgive. But I knew that I would not be able to get away, plus you will not even let me do. But who knows, perhaps it is also thanks to my clumsy attempt to abandon it, he put his feelings in order. I never understood how she could be in love with me, "Edward murmured as if talking to himself.
"are two of us not to understand," said Jacob, before yawning silently again.
'It is more logical way, that we love you and you love yourself. From your thoughts, I know you love her almost as much as me, and also how he feels with you, it makes sense that things are as they go. Love should not be complicated and fraught with problems, a difficult love is not worth living. Now it seems that shine like the sun on my skin. Love is just a beautiful thing, enhances who you are, just that to improve yourself. There is nothing more beautiful that I can be at peace with themselves. It seems that slowly, Bella is starting to accept. At least I think so. "
"Yes, I think so too," Jacob whispered.
"I know. Judging by the voice, Edward was smiling.
"Anyway," Jacob continued in a tone strangely hesitant. 'you're gone because they did not want to turn it into a bloodsucker. Have you always wanted her to remain human, more or less. "
Edward said slowly. "Jacob, from the moment I realized that he loves her, I realized that the chances were four. The first alternative, the best for Bella, would be to ignore my feelings let loose and go further. For me it would not change much, I would have done a reason. You think I am ... a stone, hard and cold. It's true. This is our nature, and it is very rare that undergoes profound changes. If this happens, as it was when Bella came into my life, change is irreversible. Not going back ...
The second alternative, the one for which I chose at the beginning, was to stay close throughout the course of his human existence. Perhaps it would have been happy to spend the life with a being that was not human, but it seemed the easiest choice. I was sure that when he died, I would have sought a way to die. Sixty, seventy years ... seemed so short a period of time, but I realized that living in close contact with my world would be too dangerous for her. It seemed that everything was going the wrong way. Or threatened to do so ...
I was terrified that even those would not last sixty years, if I had accompanied his human life. So I chose the third option. [...] I decided to get out of his world, hoping to force her to choose the first alternative. And it worked, thank God 'absurd what I've done lately, after all the fuss that I've done to succeed. But if I had succeeded, my only option was the fourth alternative. was what she wanted , at least, what he thought to be desired. I would however tried to delay, to grant the time because he found a reason to change idea, but it is too ... stubborn. So do you. He the terror of growing old but now it seems to have forgotten that his birthday falls in September .... "
[...] "You know perfectly well what it costs me to admit it," Jacob whispered slowly, "but it is clear to me that you love your way .... I can not argue with. I hope to be able to stand the rivalry. "
"As long as you can still choose to be with you, Jacob. After I do not know what could happen. I know nothing of the future, "said Edward.
"Someone, though," Jacob suggested.
"I will ask you to do it again after all this is over. He can not see your future, nor that now that Bella has joined you. But we try, we can understand something, "Edward assured her.
"I'd be curious," he said with another yawn. "Although I believe my theories. Anyway, thanks for the sincerity. Not that I forgive you with this, mind you. "
"As I said before, I'm grateful to be part of his life [...] . It was the least I could do ... You know, Jacob, were it not that we are sworn enemies and did you steal my only reason for living, I think I would go to genius. "
"Maybe if I were not a disgusting vampire who plans to suck the life of the girl I love I just do not take more ... well, 'no, not even in that case."
Edward chuckled.
"Goodbye Jacob, Seth and I'll stay to watch," Edward whispered conciliatory.
"It's not bad that you are here, at least if Seth yelps are not forced to go out and turn me to hear what he says. And then Bella needs me, "said Jacob kidnapped by drowsiness.
"See? Everything back. If not then I did some dreams, you do me a big favor, "suggested Edward.
But Jacob was already snoring.
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